I’m usually an upbeat, happy kind of person, but lately, I’ve been grumpy and sad. I’ve been perplexed by the fact that I’m also feeling depressed.
Everything in my life is great, so I’m confused about why I’m feeling physically lethargic, mentally fuzzy and generally gloomy.
As I pondered this situation, I realized that this is the time of year when my mother died. Several years ago, on Sept. 27, the loving, wonderful woman who had always been my rock, let go and moved on. She was 91 years old, had lived a good life and was ready. But I wasn’t, and still am not.
I’ve gone on with my life, but not a day passes when I don’t think of something I forgot to ask her, wish we could laugh together about, or I could receive her wise counsel on a troubling matter.
Even though I miss her every day, I’m usually able to enjoy my life and function just fine. However, each year in the fall my subconscious reminds my body that it’s a time of grief, and I feel “down” for a while. Once I identify what’s going on, I can relax, be gentle with myself, and get on with things. Still, it’s disconcerting until I remember that I’m reliving my grief over having an empty space where my mother should be.
What always amazes me is how my subconscious and body remember, even when my conscious mind is focused elsewhere.
So this month I’m reflecting on my mother and all the other wonderful people who were physically in my life and are now just in my heart. I’m focusing on celebrating the love and rejoicing in the fact that we had time together.
I’m also reflecting on how incredible the human mind/body connection is, and how grateful I am that it helps remind me of the important stuff.
Sandra Abell
Sandy is a best-selling author, life and business coach, speaker, and Licensed Counselor. She specializes in working with professionals, entrepreneurs, and people dealing with life transitions, and is the author of the Amazon bestseller Feeling Good About You and Moving Up To Management for New Supervisors (both available on Amazon.com). Please visit Sandy on her website at www.insidejobscoach.com to check out her books and sign up for her free newsletters.
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